last night i was absentmindedly toying with something on the kitchen counter while i was on the computer and when i looked down i realized it was a cockroach. i was petting it. i was petting a cockroach and the cockroach was sitting there probably really enjoying it. we had a moment. you know that thing of when two straight guys accidentally do something gay and then they freak out when they realize whats happening well it was exactly like that
Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.
- Søren Kierkegaard (via kushandwizdom)
Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man … living in the sky. Who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer, and suffer, and burn, and scream, until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you. He loves you and he needs money.
- George Carlin (via kushandwizdom)